Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
