Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize