Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
