is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Randomize
