Plan B is the new Plan A
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize