we have officially lost it.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
