Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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