Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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