Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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