Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
