Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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