guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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