pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
