i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize