I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
