Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
