I only kidnapped one of them. chill
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
