Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
