If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
