Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
i just made my gag reflex go away.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
