Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
not ubering you a puppy
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
