I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Randomize
