At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
