I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
