You're so nebulous sometimes
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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