I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
