yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
