we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
