I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
