If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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