ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize