And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
