I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
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