every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
