If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize
