As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
