I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
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