He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
