I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Randomize
