she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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