How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Don't EVER smell your tampon
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
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