I hate all girls vehemently.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
