Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Randomize
