Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize