She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize