Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize