Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
