Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Randomize
