I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
We just shotgunned beers for America
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Randomize
