I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Randomize
