Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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