We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize